Acquisition of the heartful mind

Review : Dead Space

2008-11-01T18:03:00.002+13:00

Dead Space... sounds like a horror game, and it is! Pretty good for a horror game, but still have to be compared to the likes of Doom 3!!!

--> Check Dead Space off list

You play as a man who's searching for his... girlfriend? wife? sister? Who knows!! On this ship of class "Planet Cracker" -- this is basically a planet version of harvesting rocks. It somehow cracks the planet's surface and pulls it up into space and processes it. Cool idea huh?
Upon arrival, nobody seems to be answering the call, which is fine for a horror game and the ship that you're in crash lands into the docking bay (typically). You exit your crashed ship with a few others and enter the complex, as a standard horror game goes, you have gore, gore and blood all over the place. First thing you notice is how WONDERFUL the 3-D interface is... as in... the Issac's HUD, not YOURS, but HIS!! He's got this suite like iron man and he has a HUD. This is projected into the 3-d space in front of you like a hologram, FUCKING AWESOME.
As the game continues you get your standard 1 by 1 introduction of enemies, initially you don't have a weapon so you have to run like a sissy down and take the elevator down. You find your new best friend and ion cutter (of the sort) and "Cut off their limbs" written in blood. You shrug and bam bam away you go.
The story consists of running little errands throughout the planet cracker ship and defeating crazy monsters along the way. You get to play space invaders a few times and Z-G basketball? or something like that.
Good things about the game are each enemy has a slight weakness, it might be the knees, arms or their.. tails..... But usually a few shots from mr Ion cutter and they usually die. The game doesn't scare you AS MUCH AS YOU POSSIBLY CAN, they didn't milk the game enough, they probably assumed that people are so scared they tend to spam their bullets a lot too... between my 4 weapons, on medium I didn't seem to run out of ammo at all.
The game's bosses are too easy, they basically have targets on them saying "shoot here, ask questions later" very consol game!

Overall, story was pretty decent, strange clipping issues and lack of usage of scary atmosphere :(

This upcoming holiday!

2008-10-27T01:02:00.002+13:00

This upcoming holiday - things I need to do :
Games to play/complete
Crysis : Warhead
Farcry 2
Sacred 2
Fallout 3
Red Alert 3
Legendary
James Bond Quantum of solace
Mirror's edge
Left 4 dead
GTA4
prince of Persia
Velvet Assassin
ON THAT NOTE
Need to upgrade my graphics card... Else the things above can not be done :(
Also do a few problems at Project Euler

Flame wars!

2008-10-25T20:36:00.002+13:00

GRRR Ultimate flame wars.
I used to be a pro flamer in the good old Guild Wars forum posting days. *sigh* Good times... I've retained some of the spunk from the good old days, I still feel like flaming a bad design... just looking at GG's interface makes me wanna FLAME IT!!!
Having done a Cosc course in human interface design doesn't quench the need to flame!!!

Note: HCI (human interface design) is basically design of a user interface. Interface is a program's outlook. Like... Windows has a lot of interesting HCI components. EG. Press Start->Shutdown to shutdown. START = SHUTDOWN??? random right?

Team effort

2008-10-24T16:47:00.002+13:00

Just recently, i was part of a group project, and you know what REALLY GRINDS MY GEARS!!? People who say, "I'll get it done, sweet OKAY!!" and then... the following few weeks.. NADA! Zilch!! Zero. And when confronted, they say "oh sorry, I was meaning to get it done" (MEANING ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH FOOL) So now, that 'forgiven' person is set a new task... and you guessed it, same thing happens AGAIN! There's a saying, fool me once, shame on me, fool me twice, I can't be fooled again (Pres G.W.Bush Jr.) - I love that stupid quote, but you all know the original right? But as a group we decided to turn a blind eye.

This happened several times (that and him not showing up to meetings bothered the collective) till the point where we just accepted failure from any task that he would perform. At the final few days, he managed to pull off his designated task by burning the midnight oil and get it done. I'm sorry, but that's just not good enough. There are a lot of sayings about limiting factors - the collective is only as strong as the weakest. (I can't rephrase that in a more elegant way as I can't be bothered so no flaming about this particular clause)

This person, fails at being a team player. But what can we do? Not like we can fire him from a "random drawn" team.... *sigh* and we're one of the top 5 groups... just to think there are MORE dysfunctional people in other groups *shudder*

For future reference, please do not say "i'll get it done" and not report to anyone about your progress of "lack-of". If you're not gonna do it, don't say you're gonna do it. If you are, keep us updated!!! grrrr angry!

Why humans are stupid

2008-10-10T21:00:00.005+13:00

Evolution.... if it were real (for those who favour creationism), the logic goes... smarter people produce smarter babies.. and dumb people produce dumber babies.
RIGHT! That's the basics, lets assume smart people stick with smart people, dumb people stick with dumb people.
Smart people plan for families
Smart people try to have successful careers (primary focus on career and not on reproduction)
Dumb people do whatever
Dumb people can't have a great career so they fornicate one another (primary focus on reproduction)
Heat and bake with evolution, genetic drift on for several thousand years.
So.... the amount of babies that the dumb people produce will be more than smart people.
Conclusion : Dumb people are a plenty, smart ones are harder to find.
Solution : Snip reproductive systems off from people with an IQ lower than (X) and provide a better system for smart people having kids.
But that's inhumane!!! Stupid humans!

Closer

2008-07-27T21:35:00.003+12:00

For a moment through time and space, we are one. Destined to follow the same path, separately but at the same time. Strangely, time and space doesn't allow us to do this. I wish we can be together always, closer than anything else in the physical universe, bounded together, forever. I want you to be closer to me, but what I want is not what I can have. You've slipped through my fingers too many times.
Thoughts of holding you in my arms quickly travels into the abyss in my mind, they yearn to be forgotten by vote of the collective. Hope is the only part of the grand collective of feelings that keeps you up on it's walls, soon to be taken down.

Man's best friend

2008-07-07T20:00:00.002+12:00

He sits, he lays down, he comes when called,
He eats, he sleep, he plays when bored,
He growls, he snarls, he barks when angry,
He's caring, he's fun, he's lively
He's man's best friend.

She stands there

2008-07-06T00:24:00.002+12:00

She stands there... holding onto something so beautiful, completely startled by it. The world around her becomes muted by it's mere presence. She felt so powerful holding it in her hands, "It doesn't belong to me alone" ,she says to herself in the silent but busy room.
Today she felt the future in her hands... she enjoyed it. So much... she wants to do it again and again.

Chipmunk on the roof

2008-07-05T00:13:00.002+12:00

Scuttling, it's the noise you hear 3 seconds before your alarm clock goes off.
Little crunching noises as you pour milk into your cereal.
More scuttling as you get into your car.
"There's a chipmunk somewhere in this house i think... should i kill it or let it go? Eh~ Whatever," is what you tell yourself.
You honestly can't be bothered getting rid of it, plus it's just there not doing anything... i hope...

Do not fret, the inquisitor cometh

2008-07-03T02:30:00.002+12:00

One says, "Hi" another says, "Hey", but ultimately, this person says nothing. Did they mean to say anything? Or is he simply ignorant of your presence? Thoughts must race over yourself to who this person is... are they... mute? Expressionless? Do they simply just detest you? No... of course not, I'm lovable, no one can resist my charms. Somehow, that person has dodged every bullet you fired. You grow furious and maybe admit a little anxious about it. You tell yourself just let it go, and you do... that person... the one you used to love... they just tossed you away without even a glance.

Do you understand the pain?

Updates....

2008-05-30T23:44:00.004+12:00

No more... strength to go on.... blogging streak... ending
lack of motivation to go on.
*sigh*
it is sad to witness a death of a blog
even worse being the executioner.
nobody will read... nobody will see... the true genius will never be discovered in time to save the world. flattering myself won't resurrect the remains of this blog.
Sad but true.
If a blog falls in blog-universe, does it make a sound...?
Only the cries of readers.... of which there is none.

You are an inspiration to me

2008-05-16T18:54:00.004+12:00

You are an inspiration to me
The very essence of your being,
The way you subdue others with your charms,
The articulation of your words,
The reminder that you will always be there,
The justifications you give to your actions,
The understanding you portray,
The vibrancy of your glare,
The formation of your sentences,
The thriller that is being you.

You are an inspiration to me,
Without you I would be nothing.
Without you I would feel nothing,
Without you I would try nothing,
Without you I would say nothing,
Without you I would see nothing.

You are an inspiration to me,
everything that I do not want to be.

We simply don't care

2008-05-11T21:25:00.003+12:00

Sitting at home, completely unaware of the growing explosive tumor in my brain that is a ticking time bomb. Which is one possibility of my demise, yours too. But we carry on with our lives as it were normal, unknowingly making arrangements that we will not be able to attend to, making promises that we can not keep. Because you're dead and all~~ No grudges can be held there - I hope.
The question that comes up often in our lives as we receive bad news that we can not do anything about. Is it really worth knowing if you can not do a damn about it? War in some middle eastern place that we can't do anything about. Brain tumor that's growing inside citizen A's head that will explode in 10 seconds from now? Unconsciously we make the choice not to care deeply about these people who are not directly connected to us.
I'm not saying we should shed a thousand tears for each individual that passes away. In contrast to not giving a damn about your dying parents. I'm simply raising the issue to the fact that us being human beings do not care much about others that we can not feel the effects of. Sadly but true, we do not give a damn about something that does not affect directly.
A sad and true fact.

Simplify your life!!

2008-04-29T19:11:00.003+12:00

As we mature and age, we develop a need for complexity. Where there is none or little, we make it complicated and sophisticated for no apparent reason what so ever. Or is there an underlaying desire to be smarter and more clever than other people? We thrive on complexity, from our languages, to our technology and most importantly, our relationships with people. Why is it that we enjoy enduring complicated relationships with people we love? If you see it from one perspective, we enjoy being miserable. If you see it from another, we think too much about things. Wish we could all just enjoy what we have, who we have, for all their worth.
If it's complicated, simplify!

The hill

2008-04-25T23:47:00.003+12:00

As I stand on the top of the hill overlooking the city, I think silently. I think about the people who live in this city, how far away are they? Can I see them from here? Do they know I'm looking over them? Probably not. I smile, hoping someone from below catches the flicker of light my teeth reflects. I continue to look ahead, I can feel the wind now, swaying me left.

sigh didn't want to do this but I'm bored

2008-04-20T22:41:00.003+12:00

The rules:-

1. Link to your tagger and post these rules. Yinny
2. List eight (8) random facts about yourself.
3. Tag eight people at the end of this post and list their names.
4. Let them know they’ve been tagged by leaving them a comment on their blogs.

--Severely damaged the bone structure of my right elbow when I was 4, leaving me a disfigured right elbow.
--I have a snow white (as in... like snow) teddy bear that is currently wearing my balaclava posing as a terrorist in my room.
--Desperately in need of a haircut.
--Can crack almost every crackable joint in my body (like cracking knuckles++)
--I can be serious when the time presents itself (which you may not believe)
--I bring my water bottle around with me everywhere (sometimes I forget and leave it at the flat)
--Currently have 3 assignments due and haven't gone over 50% in any of the three.
--Not terribly effected by music.

I tag nobody 8 times, because I honestly CAN'T BE BOTHERED!

The most mundane tasks!

2008-04-19T18:56:00.002+12:00

I've got new found respect for programmers out there that programmed the normal "break" in a sentence. The ones that naturally press "enter" for you when it reaches the end of the line, it's not easy that's for sure, IT IS NOT EASY! Had to write like a hundred line of code JUST SO IT DOES THAT!!! 100!!! if any one of the fails, the program doesn't work!!! ANNOYING RIGHT~!!!?
Such a mundane task of pressing "enter" at the end of the line once if fills up, so simple? NO IT'S NOT!
So note to self and others, pay more respect to computer programmers and "nerds" as you call them, they're the ones that decide how to make the programs that you need for your business. Your MIR machine? Your GPS! The phone you're holding onto right now, your screen! Your entire life if you revolve around anything technologically advanced. Respect should be dolled out to these people who have made these things come to reality, don't be dissing!

Don't hide

2008-04-14T21:20:00.002+12:00

You're beautiful, don't ever hide it from the world
Like a flower, except you're always in full bloom
You bring colour into your surroundings
I wish I could be close to you just to feel your refreshing aura
But if you hide, nobody will be able to find you
Beauty should not be wasted in a dark world
We need you, so don't hide from the world.

Found these, digging through stuff

2008-04-12T23:13:00.004+12:00

Just looking through some old photos on my Pc, it's pretty interesting stuff

The tower of doom, looks like a giant evil lair to me if you REALLY think about it

Took it waiting for fish and chips and Allan, saw it and decided that the cloud swirl looked pretty neat

The candy floss itself could possibly be larger than the kid it self!!! ZOMFG!

A random picture i took of my old dog, who's passed away :( So cute~~

My cousin, 2 days younger than my sister (Mum's sister's son) Acting like he's constipated in a kimono that my other cousin is going to wear (female) it's obviously too big for him

Eye of the Beholder

2008-04-12T22:39:00.003+12:00

Note: Re-reading my blog title and decided, hummm just been ranting and talking about random stuff, not actually letting you relax and let me do the thinking. Haven't been doing that. Not very thoughtful during the past few days, but however, here's something interesting.

Ever just wonder, what makes other's see different things? We both have brains, but why do they get something I don't and vise versa? It's a simple common sense, or at least, that's what you think. Here's a strange example : a person may see the world in a different colour than your own. If you were to receive the same information from their eye into your brain, you might be seeing the colour red instead of green, but strangely, you disagree with him/her on whether it's red or green. They say it's green, but to you, it should be green but it's red.
What they see is red, but call it green.
Have you ever thought about that?

If you have, I congratulate you on self exploration. If you haven't, I hope you're not confused.

Argh!!! Women!

2008-04-08T21:11:00.003+12:00

Sometimes, I swear!!! (yes i do that often but you're missing the point ENTIRELY) Women!!! they drive you up the wall so high you can say hi to the moon!!!
Oh~~ What is it this time that they've done now Panny? You ask, WELL!!! Lets start from the beginning *rubs out green blackboard and starts chalking in a thought bubble*
You have women complaining about how "men are such jerks" and yada yada yada, (which seems to be the media norm) and then you have the "men who aren't such jerks" who oppose the men who are. What's your point? I'M GETTING TO IT!!! READ!!! Nobody really travels down the "women side of things" if you know what i mean, mostly because women are perceived as sugar and spice and everything nice, that and or all directors have to present their movie/media project on a board of ALL FEMALE MEMBERS!!!! Women sometimes forget that they themselves can be the "jerk" of the species, I'm not saying that men aren't, but women are as well.
That's a bit harsh don't you think Panny boi? No! that's my point, it's because we aren't so critical about women as we are about men, probably because women already have such low self esteem, if we bash them any further they'd probably go into an emotional coma! Most women "care" for lack of a better word about what they look like and what not, it's hard to find a woman who doesn't give a shit about weight and appearance. You could say that some do, but if I add in "relative to men! <- who are straight not gay!!" You'll agree with me some more.
That's not quite the point entirely. The tip of the point (ha ha) is that women can be as much as a jerk as men, if not more. They often have the upper hand which leads to them being manipulative of men's emotions. We are (men) not emotionless, it's less apparent because we aren't hormonal a quarter of our lives.
And there's MORE!!! Women openly hurt men like they are "allowed" to.... which is just cruel!!! Enough said
Fool me once, shame on you! Fool me twice, well... i can't be fooled again! (George W.Bush Jr)

Things to own!

2008-03-31T19:11:00.002+13:00

Things to own... when you become a gazillionare! or have so much money you don't actually know what to do with it.
I can't say much about what you want, but here's what I've come up with so far on my list of wants.

-That wack waveing inflatable arm flailling tube man from family guy
-Swimming pool of bean bag beans
-Side pool with jelly!!
-A yellow school bus
-Barney suit
-Robotic Dinosaur (the cheap ones you see at slightly-amusing-amusement parks)

This is the list currently, more ideas might spring forth!

Me and my anus!

2008-03-30T19:55:00.003+13:00

woah woah woah!!! A little graphic? Maybe! But that's not the point! Me and my anus! Titled by me! Because it's legendary.
How to use :
It's easy! Instead of "your mum!" used "My ANUS!"
often degrading to the user but gets the point across
commonly used as an insult to what the target is or is doing

Examples :
Hey, can you pick up that potato?
My ANUS can pick up that potato!!

I wish I can do maths so well.
My ANUS can do maths well!!!!

Basically, it's universal, JUST DO IT! My ANUS CAN DO IT!
It doesn't have to make any sense what so ever, use as directed for a comical effect to something mundane or to defuse tense situations. MY ANUS CAN DEFUSE TENSE SITUATIONS!!!

this... is ..... LEGENDARY!!!!

2008-03-30T00:43:00.001+13:00

I got 1 word for it!! JUST ONE!!!

LEGENDARY!!!!!

Tears of my Sun

2008-03-29T20:28:00.003+13:00

Even the Sun may cry on occasions. It's okay, we will wait with you.

Fish out of water

2008-03-22T11:10:00.002+13:00

The fact is, fish don't belong anywhere else but in water (alive that is). So... that's why the saying "like a fish out of water" comes from, but what happens if two fish were out of water? Does the rule of not belonging still apply? And what happens when there's an entire school of fish out of water? Would that be so strange?
And finally, what about all the fish out of water? Surely that wouldn't be strange at all!!

I honestly don't

2008-03-21T17:40:00.002+13:00

I don't want to be the jackass, not really. It's a horrible thing to be. I'm a nice guy, but being the devil's advocate it so much more entertaining. Plus, if someone's already "reserved", what am I to do? Act like a complete jackass and provide a contrast between the "reserve-ee" and the others. Essentially, the wing man. The general outline of the wing man is that he doesn't have any ulterior motives, acts like a complete fool and yea! Get who they're "backing up" laid, or hooked up etc etc... If that's the definition of being a wing man, I've pretty much got a PHD in it - maybe just the make a fool of myself part.
I'm such a jackass, and that would be a euphonism.
What to do when all targets are engaged? Spin around in circles and hope the base calls you back to chill some more.

Good Company

2008-03-19T23:34:00.003+13:00

*Sigh*, it's like when someone deals you the "friend card", oh yea!!! FRIEND CARD!!! It's so mean! Why can't the friend be more than just a friend? I just don't understand. I'm only good company, but good company doesn't get you laid or into a relationship, but isn't it essentially what a relationship needs? Good company!!? Here I am, thinking yay! But in fact, it's like, "You're great to be around, just not as a person I wanna be around" <-- that doesn't even make sense!!!
Just a tad angry, slightly bored out of my mind and lonely :\
Cause the above isn't completely EMOTIONAL! bahh!!! Just want to feel again, to make someone feel, to matter to someone! But nobody wants just good company and cheesy jokes.

WHERE ARE YOU!!!

Provocation

2008-03-18T19:38:00.002+13:00

Why would I say dodgy things? To put certain phrases into your mind. But it's your choice to "play" the same game with me or call me perverted.
Just today, talking to TWO GIRLS!!!! (yes, g.i.r.l.s!!!! not women or ladies, still girls!!! - and for those of you who know what i'm talking about, YOU KNOW!!!) and I was called perverted. WELL!!! Maybe!! If you don't play this provocative verbal game. I only know a few girls who'd join in on this game, and I applaud you! And for those of you who don't, it's a shame cause we're not on the same page honey~~
I know i know, it's a little perverted, but I didn't say it, but you're thinking it! Did I make you think of it? Or you already thought of it!
I don't know, I just miss having someone else think for me.
Don't respond if you're just gunna bash me please

Horribly Desensitised

2008-03-15T22:32:00.003+13:00

Yes, I'm horribly desensitised (or according to dictionary.com, it's more like... desensitized!!! - i hate americans). What does that mean Pan? You ask! Well! I'll tell you! You should have heard of those "e-shock videos" that are on the internet, such as "meat spin", "tubgirl", "goat.xe (or something)" and various other shock horror vid/pics.
The latest craze is the "2 girls 1 cup" and it's spin offs (just as disgusting or more). As sad as it may seem, I just laughed at the video and then cheered them on and made pleasurable "mmmm - delicious" sounds (sarcastically OF COURSE!!) In the case of the bit where she passes the load on like "snowballing" - yes, google THAT! - I just cheered and said "yea!!! you go girl"
I'm disturbed by my own actions, very so much that I'm making this blog post. I'm more concerned with how happy I was after watching it and just wanting to laugh at it some more and press replay just over the awesome chocolaty moments! MMMM Who wants chocolate ice cream and moro bars!!! YUM!

The illusion of choice

2008-03-11T23:36:00.003+13:00

You believe that you have a choice whether or not to take the blue pill or red pill, but in fact, you don't have that choice at all, choices you make are predetermined set of values and variables set subliminally. In fact, you've already taken the pill before the choice has been presented to you.
The thought of destiny scares us, as we are "meant" for something, a set purpose that may or may not be apparent to us yet. Everyone knows the classic "it is your destiny, join the dark side" argument that Darth Vadar puts up but that's not enough to convince anyone. We all want to think we have control over our lives, our own destiny. To a degree yes, but you wouldn't expect a poor starving African child to become a tycoon over the course of his/her life. In the rare event that it happens, but the decision is not theirs to make.

Did you chose to read this far? Or have I made the content interesting enough for you to read? Is that my choice, or yours?

Blogs

2008-03-10T22:31:00.002+13:00

Seems like nobody cares anymore, which is a sad fact. I, myself have more things to blog about, feelings in need to be shared, words unspoken.
Maybe it's time for me to take a break from this, seeing as how nobody reads much of it anyway.

Beach, The

2008-03-09T22:42:00.003+13:00

Spent a fun day at the beach just on Saturday, built a nice sand castle tower, caught some waves and swam a little, ran across the sand and did that scorpion king come out from under the sand thing - which was just me putting sand over my head and then having a hard time scratching it all out.

So far, I have no sun burns (Yea!!) but if you ask, I'll show you some flesh ;).

Tee-Vee madness

2008-03-08T22:20:00.006+13:00

Sat down, was looking through all the TV eps i've watched.... thought about the ones that I have deleted from my 500gigs of AWESOMENESS!!! But then... i remembered that I wasted 1400 hours on a MMORPG - Guild Wars and considerable money on it as well a few years ago, it lasted for about 2 yeas though.
Thought about how much I've shifted my attention to the TV industry to replace my attention towards the Gaming industry. Here's the massive amounts of TV I've watched on my pc!
Category 40 min, 20eps/Season (avg)
24 (6 seasons)
Boston Legal (3 seasons)
Desperate Housewives (3 seasons)
Heroes (1 season)
Lost (3 seasons)
Prison break (2 seasons)
Stargate SG-1 (10 seasons)
Stargate Atlantis (3 seasons)
The L Word (4 seasons)
MythBusters (5 seasons)
Ugly Betty (1 seasons)
Grey's Anatomy (3 seasons)
MacGyver (3 seasons)
Battlestar Galactica (3 seasons)
One Tree Hill (4 seasons)
Firefly (1 season)
So far Tally - 55 Seasons x 40 min x 20eps= 44,000 min of fun! (733h 20m)
Well....That's a lot of hours to be honest! NOW!!! Lets count the half hour shows
Category - Half hour shows - 20 min, counting eps
Bleach (160eps)
Naruto (260eps)
Scrubs (20eps x 6 seasons = 120eps)
Full Metal Alchemist (51)
Chobits (26eps)
Guns x Swords (26eps)
Full Metal Panic (24eps +13eps)
Ichigo 100% (13eps)
Blood + (50eps)
Sad!!! A total of 743eps of 20 min shows = 14,860 min of fun!!(247h 40m)
That's just what I have watched in full seasons, probably add another 100 hours onto the top of that so... 247.4 + 733.2 + 100 = 1,081 hours of AWESOME FUN!!!!
It's funny looking at it now, 1400 vs 1081 hours (minimum estimate) and I haven't even included the movies I've watched and some other shows that I've missed out
like....
supernatural (3 seasons) 40 min
Smallville (6 seasons) 40 min
Reaper (half a season) 40 min
Kyle XY (1.8 season) 40 min
Journeyman (half a season) 40 min
Gossip Girl (half a season) 40 min
CSI (2 seasons) 40 min
Bones (2 seasons) 40 min
Who's line is it anyway (2 seasons) 20 min
Which equates to approx 13,840 min 230h 40min
1400 hours vs 1311.6 hours
100 off of the fun times I've had in Guild Wars!!!!!! *sigh*
Lets see... If i did all those in two years.... and sleep 8 hours a day in a 365 days Which is approx 11.2% of my day consists of watching TV!!! and adding in the fact that I spend 6 hours in school/uni, out of the free time I have at home 18.4% of my spare time! of 10 hours each day every day. I watched 2~4 episodes of something a day for the past 2 years!

I think that's enough number crunching for the day!

Hesitate

2008-02-29T23:48:00.003+13:00

These words, I should say them without hesitation.
I hesitate.
These things, I should point them out without hesitation.
I hesitate.
These feelings, I should share them without hesitation.
I hesitate.

To share

2008-02-28T23:03:00.003+13:00

To share would be too much,
We all need out secrets,
Hidden we shall remain,
For how long?

To share would be strange,
We like to be unknown,
Hidden from the others,
For how long?

To share would be to reveal truths,
We love to lie,
Hidden behind barricades of lies,
Not for long.

Desperation

2008-02-28T22:57:00.003+13:00

We can all be desperate at times,
desperate for food,
desperate for money,
desperate for time,
desperate for attention,
desperate for order,
desperate for companionship,
desperate for justice,
desperate for a life.
Desperate, at a cost.

Inspiration

2008-02-27T23:49:00.002+13:00

We all need inspiration, but where do we find it? Is it inside a painting? Behind a sculpture? At the tip of the pencil of which you are holding onto?
We all need inspiration, and they come from different places. Some see it behind a painting, in front of a sculpture, in the hand of which you hold the pencil.

Harmful Truths

2008-02-18T20:38:00.003+13:00

Hiding the truth from the people you love may seem like a good idea every way you look at it. That is.... in favour for you! It's the victims that gets the shorter end of the stick no matter what. It's a lose lose situation for the one being sheilded from the truth. Every time, when the truth does come out, he/she would usually say that they would've rather known the truth, but is that true? If you did tell them, they'd probably shut you down, and it may make the friendship tare.

Is it better to say harmful things if it's the truth? Or is it better to say nothing and still be harmful?

What kind of person are you?

Moral issues

2008-02-15T23:44:00.002+13:00

Just sitting at home watching the news on tv. It's so sad! All depressing, very very depressing.
But that's not what this post is about, I'm not too concerned about the depressing news that's on tv, just the moral ethical issues behind the news.

People making fake mushrooms (buying shitty ones and carving them and sculpting them to pass off as a high hard to make mushroom)
Making drugs more appealing to younger people by putting them in a hello kitty bag.
People selling fake alcohol (methanol) which makes you blind.
Fake eggs that can cause Alzheimer's.
Highly cancerous products being released onto the market.
Massive money laundering done by our political figures

But to make things worse
There are millions suffering from malnutrition in tw and then there are even more people buying highly expensive products from big expensive brands.
Scam artists that "claim" they are the banks and then siphon our your money (if you follow their commands)

Not only are we stupid! We're just brainless. An organisation known as "scientology" believes that we were brought here by the all mighty XENU - of the galactic federation - dictator!!! From small scale ships similar to the DC-7 (or another model or a large airplane) to planet earth and then nuked with H-Bombs (that's when i stopped reading cause i was on the floor dying of laughter) and then to raise in the "organisation's" ranks, you have to give all your life savings and then the very top "masters" will share with you advanced alien technology.

Tom Cruise, I have lost all respect for you.
Humans are stupid! VERY VERY STUPID! And highly selfish. Hope you know that now with proof

Resolutions 08

2008-02-13T06:56:00.000+13:00

Resolutions 08. Said to myself resolutions are stupid and they always will be but I've decided that this year's main resolution of mine will be these :
Exercise for personal health benefits - be able to run 5k without stopping
Focus on my education - because i know the road ahead will be hard
Be more responsible - Maybe get a job
Be more social - in general
Become someone I can be proud of! (yes that did sound uber cheesy!)

I hope you will carry out your own resolutions for 08, may it make you a better person.

China, the traffic

2008-02-12T06:26:00.000+13:00

2 times.... i have been to china, to various locations.... and all somewhat developed locations have roads! And hence traveling utilities such as a car!
Of the car variety, I'm targeting taxis!!!

Dear Taxi drivers of China,
You lot are a very very crazy lot. For the price you charge at 7rmb initial and 1.2rmb per km after the first 3
Overall, the service is on par with the cheap cheap price that it is... (approx 5rmb = 1 nzd) which means.... it's pretty well.... decent!
That is if you don't count the major traffic violations (according to nz transport safety association)
Apparently over in china, signaling is for the weak!!! and smoking is for the awesome! direct turning (without crossing traffic ie.... nz would be to turn left) while red light is approved. Driving like a crazy lunatic in the country is accepted and honking your horns is equivalent to "hi! I'm here and i'm going to charge so back off or you're gonna have to deal with my insurance company!!!! rawrrrr!!!"
So... it's pretty shabby but meh! Gets you from A-B cheaply

Storyboards

2008-02-05T22:30:00.000+13:00

Recently been thinking to write a twisted little short story.
But the scenario is so hard to imagine and the descriptions are need to be very precise to portray the wickedness of the main character.
Should really read some books... but the sight of myself in the library borrowing out literature is so hard to imagine :s
One of you should throw me a book or something

Young vs Old

2008-02-05T03:48:00.000+13:00

When the young need to teach the old about manners, it's a terrible terrible sight indeed. As we look up to our elders for advice, is it socially acceptable to give a lecture to someone signifigantly older?
Thoughts please if anyone reads

42

2008-01-30T19:33:00.000+13:00

The all time question that is Life, what is the meaning of it! But as the show/movie/radio/books episodes of "Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy" the question and the answer can not be in the same universe. Strange as it may seem, I think you shouldn't be asking what is the meaning of life, but what WOULD be the meaning to YOUR life!

Shouldn't contemplate on something you can not comprehend, as you will not obtain the true answer but only a fraction of it.

I know the meaning of life - it's simply, to live. (but that's only a fraction of it)

Thoughts

2008-01-30T02:20:00.000+13:00

Thoughts.... they're like fish and we are all sitting at the dock, casting our lines hoping to catch them as they appear. Of course, thoughts caught are the ones you are thinking right now. Sometimes, they slip away, just as fish do (much like other types of fish). The worst of them all is when you can't catch them anymore, you see them, schools, swarming beneath the surface, but your line is broken. The feeling dreads me, unable to grasp what is right in front of me. The thought terrifies me sometimes.
I shall come back another day and fish away.

Dear You

2008-01-30T02:15:00.000+13:00

To You - My love

You, the first day I saw you, I didn't think we would be so much in love. You, the first time we talked I didn't think we would share so much in common. You, the first time we kissed I didn't think it would be my last first kiss. You, you have become my world, an extension of my body and soul, to harm you would be to harm myself.

Sincerely Me

Travels - China : GuangXi

2008-01-24T23:42:00.000+13:00

In China in the province "GuangXi" and the terrain is amazing, if you were a fellow interest in geology, you might know a thing or two about it's strange mountains.
If you are thinking, what the hell do you mean? What strange mountains - aren't mountains just... larger and taller hills? Yes... and no, if you've seen some "old paintings" related to china - in any means, especially ones with mountains and done with Black ink (only) and a brush. The old style of printing with a brush. You see the extremely tall mountains much like a pillar unlike a hill or mountain.
They are amazing and they prove true, and it's so strange the way that they are placed. Some cities here constructed their way around a single "peaks" and or on the side of one.
Something else that is special is the caves here, the caves here are just limestone caves with nice stalagmites and its counterpart (cause i forgot the name) - the caves reach up to 24 degrees in some places and have pockets of up to 90m!! *zomfg*
Have some pictures here and will load them up later, sorry if you're expecting to see some :p will upload them in due time.

More to come regarding the following
-China as a vacation spot
-China as a sight seeing spot
-Shopping
-Food (i know that's allan's fav ;))

RAGE!!!!

2008-01-23T02:51:00.000+13:00

Put my card of awesome cave pictures and A THOUSAND YEAR TURTLE!!!!!! and.... the thing loaded.... but not all, so i took a look through to see if it loaded all of them, looked at the first few images and concluded that the rest of them would've loaded.
Lost about 50 pics of 150, me thinks, and a set of really valuable few JUST AFTER the cut off, very annoying. Nice still water in the cave reflecting the stalagmites
*sigh* and a tear :(

I have learned to now check the end of the collection before deleting the pictures from the card itself :(

2008-01-10T06:27:00.000+13:00

Got bored and said Hummm..... Lets do something fun so i jumped into flash and then drew this for an hour
I present to you the Ellis II (Ellis Mark two)

Vaporial industries presents to you the new series in galactic battleship the Ellis II
The Ellis II has many new features installed like the newly developed Angel Core(tm).

Would go into more detail about the "theoretical science behind the Angel Core(tm)" but meh! Generally a semi-controlled fusion reaction that is released at the front of the battleship as high power destruction! FUN! And dangerous! Buy one today!

As you can see it's not finished yet, shall make a flash about the angel core but blogger doesn't like flash very much :( *tear*
This is done with my kewl new pen and an hour of fun work and half an hour of trying to put flash into blogger :(
Ellis II is still under construction. If you're wondering about Ellis (original) it's also in the works, it's just a downgraded version of it, and in case you havn't noticed, I drew inspiration from the following : Starcraft Carrier (and real life carriers), The Dreadnaught in Homeworld 2
Fun times

All I see are numbers

2008-01-09T04:43:00.000+13:00

I don't know about you, but when I see something, I know that it can be a particular mathematical formula. I may not know what it is exactly, but I know that it can be related to maths in some way. Sorta like that crazy show about numbers called "Numb3rs" with a 3!!! Cause that's so hip hop and nasty!
But more to the point, it's interesting to play a game and watch it's engine to cool things and realise the math behind it and various behaviour patterns that different units have and what kind of improvements it requires and where it needs it.
I think I'm becoming more and more like a computer scientist.
The feeling is like reading a painting and separating each individual detail apart and put them into their own categories. It sorta becomes a 3-D image viewed side on.
Nuts am I? Maybe, can you see my point?

Ten things to do when.... you go crazy

2008-01-09T00:47:00.000+13:00

I'm feeling a little crazy~~ are you~~~? (no i'm not but just for the sake of the post i'll turn up the crazy) Well! If you one day find yourself in a craaaaaaazy moood, feeling like something craaaaaazy to do, and that totally didn't make any sense at all. So! You should! Do something CaRaZy!
Did you know that crazy spelt backwards is yzarac? zomfg! gfmoz!!!! i have no idea what i'm doing

Number 10!
Lets start with something basic here, this is number 10 in the crazy countdown!
Go into a populated area and play out the titanic romance scene BY YOURSELF!!!! (the I'm the king of the world one) Playing BOTH roles.
Well... been there and done that?
NUMBER 9!!!!
Do a crazy stupid/retarded accent for the entire day!!! Well... it may not sound crazy, but it's damn hard. Try it for an hour and see if you can do that for another say.... day?
Still not hitting that spot yet?
Number 8!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Okay that was not really needed but hey! Might as well go c c c c c c razy!!! like an emo with a razor blade! It's gonna cut! Like CA RA ZY!
Alright, to the point! Number 8! Pretend that you are actually IN A SHOOT OUT! As in... bullets are wizzing past and you have to hug the wall and look around corners and stay low as you carry out orders.
Number 7
This isn't exactly about you! It's about the person you talk to. EVERY SENTENCE! IS! A QUESTION? Yes it is, try it out!!! And you'll sure get somewhere as you watch someone kick you!!! In the FACE! (hope it's not chuck norris)
Number 6
Running low on crazy ideas here? NO!? Yes? Almost! But wait, that's not all!
Put on sunglasses and walk down the street with a cane LIKE A BLIND MAN!!! AND BUMP INTO EVERYONE!!! You'll sure be hated but no one is gonna hit a cripple.
Number 5
Lay out lines and lines of petrol and then make pretty pictures with them and then set it afire!!!! (isn't that a crime?) YES IT IS!!! So don't do this unless... oh wait, CRAZY!!!
Number 4
Yell jibberish at anyone you wanna talk to (lame! seen it done before - ever consider that THEY'RE CRAZY!!?)
Nuuuuummmmmber tree!!!!!
When someone has their back turned against you, you mock them by mouthing their words and doing something rediculous. You're getting pretty looney there?
Number tooooooooooooooooooo
When preachers come around to "spread the faith" tell them you worship the one true god LUCIFER!!! That'll cause some mayhem
Number OOONNNNNEEEE!!!
Say "yes you do look fat in that dress" BEFORE!!!! She asks you!!! MUAHAHAHAAAAA

Got any brilliant crazy things to do!!? POST THEM! Rarhar har har har!!!

The end of 2007

2007-12-25T22:38:00.000+13:00

The end is neigh my fellow americans (like those tv announcements you see on movies when a disaster hits or something) Today! is christmas, and the time for destruction of 2007 is almost at hand! Our hopes are ever so high, and you get the point, i can't think of anything more to add to this crap.
We are sooo close to the end of 2007 it just makes me wanna find a random hot girl on the street and make out with her when the moment strikes. Meh! A fantasy I've still yet to make come true. But anyway! a new year brings new fortune and new things, what to dooo what to doo? Most people have compiled a list of their most wanted desires for this year. And or mentioned a list of hopeful actions (or the lack of) that they wish to do next year.
Oh no, you don't honestly think i would fall into either of these categories now do you? I've ran out of excuses to use when it comes to new years resolutions, if you wanna do it, just do it. Instead of making a long list that you might live up to.
Oh darn, I've lost my thought, maybe that didn't make much sense, but it's the most sense i can make it. Just DEW IT!
I'd like to say, for 2008, I've got a good feeling about it. hope you do too.
Oh yea, and happy xmas, heh i don't exactly celebrate it anyway it's lame

PenMouse thing?

2007-12-24T23:14:00.000+13:00

What is it this time?What's that you ask? Well... it's... bamboo? Black?

Point

2007-12-24T06:00:00.000+13:00

A circle has neither a beginning nor an end. For it is a continuous line... if you can call it that, cause a line has a beginning AND an end. Something just as cool as a circle is a mobius strip (sp) It has one continuous strip and it's 3-d and it has an endless face, cause face has edges, and it doesn't really have an edge.
By now, you should still be thinking, "ummm what are you getting at?" Exactly, this is my exact point. Everything we should do should have a point to it. You may disagree but if you think hard, you will find that everything you do ends up having a point.
The strange thing is, it's quite obvious that everything has a point. But! I do not know what I am trying to explain here in the long run. Doesn't mean it has no point, it has just escaped me. But then again, things don't need to have a point - or do they?

Just another day in the land of the strange

You've only got your word

2007-12-22T00:48:00.000+13:00

Some of you may know that all a person really has to offer is Trust, and therefor what they say.
Personally I hate people who can't keep their word, even in the little things. And just because you have an excuse, it doesn't make it alright.
In this world, we've only got each other, each other's word and which translates to trust. Can you trust the people around you? Can you trust them to keep their word no matter how small of a task? I certainly hope we all have people we can trust.

If all else fails, you can always trust them to be untrustworthy.
And if you often don't keep to your word, don't offer it.

Tip of my tongue

2007-12-18T18:26:00.000+13:00

The words are all assembled, all ordered like a marching band. And yet, these troops can not be deployed, the general's lack of sense prohibits their deployment into the air waves. Unable to sing their song on the airwaves, unable to fulfill their destinies as did pilots did in the wars a long long time ago.

The war is long over now, these troops never seen the horizon's edge. Still waiting for the chance, to soar, they await.

Forget

2007-12-17T07:16:00.000+13:00

Do know the difference between things you should forget, and things you should remember forever. Also note the slight difference between things you will forget and things you can not forget.
Sometimes there are moments of your life that will shape the course of your life: Meeting someone different, having a child, losing a loved one, held to at gunpoint. There are happy sugar coated memories that will turn your brain into candy floss, and then there are the deep foul stench of others that will pollute your brain and thus you.
Sometimes things are better left forgotten, but do not forget it all, remember what was important out of this failure, this way you should not do the same thing, or at least recognise it.
Sometimes things are so sweet the whole scene becomes hazy and you lose it, but you still remember the feeling of joy, at least the main parts.

I realise that this post doesn't exactly have an ordered structure and real point to it, but it's just some food for thought, sometimes we need to be reminded, to jog our memories so we don't forget. (that part did make sense right? - i forget)

The place that is Taiwan

2007-12-15T02:44:00.000+13:00

This is my diggs here in Taiwan! Great fun place really, if you exclude the midnight road works and bustling cars and truck driving past at 2am in the morning. All that and that annoying convenience store's little tune when someone walks past it's detectors.

Here's a rather nice shot actually, this is as clean and civilised an area can possibly get. See how it's so desolate? That's part of it's cleanliness - no people = no people littering and screwing things up.

This is next to the elevated rail way (above is the foundation) See how scruffy it looks now?

There are wide open spaces.... just not in those apartment clusters, beautiful, but highly dense in population

Here's the elevated rail, it rings every-now and then, which shows you how close I live. What you may notice here is the contrast in buildings. And THE BAD GRASS!!! You have the background which is technology and all shiny (some of it) and then the badly made houses behind that car. This is when new meets illegal construction and a hack slash job old.

This building is where I live. This is a very mild look into what TW is really like, it's a lot more hectic to be honest, these shots are really really calming and shows the country life.

Yea!!! This is country comparatively

Waiting for that day

2007-12-12T01:49:00.000+13:00

We all wait for that day
The day where we walk outside
And we see the world
Peaceful.

We all wait for that day
The day where we wake up
And see our partner sleeping
Silently.

We all wait for that day
The day where we look in the mirror
And we see ourselves
Happy.

And yes, it is what you think it is

2007-12-10T21:52:00.000+13:00

Degrees of "Pretty-ness"

2007-12-09T04:53:00.000+13:00

Laying in my bed, hoping to fall asleep for an early morning.... IMPOSSIBLE. Seeing as how i sleep 2 hours after this time anyway, and I've been sleeping in the car. Thoughts filled my mind, many thoughts regarding the "MegaBass tm" from my W801i, O M G. Tell you about that later heh.
A phrase occurred to me - "You're pretty, in the "I want you to hold me when I'm crying" kinda way." - strange? yea, tell me about it. Which now I'm posting a little entry about it.
Degrees of pretty-ness, don't think that's even close to a real word, BUT! I'd like to say that this falls under the "we're just friends" kinda thing that any two people of opposite sex (or same depending on your sexual orientation) come to in one stage, either at the beginning, or somewhere along the way.
So what does my phrase come under? I think it's the more than just friends category, except the crying bit - maybe just sad *ponders*.
There's also the, "You're pretty, in the "I wanna bang you" kinda way"
and, "You're pretty, "but you're just not my type" kinda way"
and then there's "HELL NO"
zing!

You know what I'd say to that

2007-12-08T05:49:00.000+13:00

Cheers for me!

2007-12-07T19:25:00.000+13:00

In case you have not checked your university exam results yet, which I doubt you have "forgotten" slash neglected to see just in case you think it can still change depending on the day outside and your current mood (like my sister believes). You should check it if you haven't done so already.

For me, a GPA of 7.00+ is still apparent, which means above a score of A-. HORRAY, I'm so relieved now that thats over, cause now i can move onto level 200 papers and maybe die? Get on with dying.

Final Tally
Cosc 121 A+
Cosc 122 A-
Chem 111 A-
Chem 112 A-
Math 115 A-
Math 231 B+

Computer Exhibition

2007-12-05T01:41:00.001+13:00

The computer exhibition, not as well known as E3 but it's the TW version of it. This is a picture loaded blog post beware!!!!Just a sea of heads. Shows how unpacked it is. (forgot to take a picture of sardine ness!! Lasts for 9 days. Dec 1 - 9)

Forgot what they were advertising, something about a phone?

Slamming? Naw... average

Asian women, or more like TW showgirls

Have I seen you before? That's right, you're picture is next to the word "daaaang" in the dictionary

Yours must be "slamming"

She looks japanese? Maybe she is!!!

Here's the two hotties that were giving out AMD glaives, I missed out.God know!!

I have a Cannon Digital camera, pick me!!

Samsung, average showgirl like their products

Think it was something to do with printers

The exhibition was fun, if you're wondering why there are no pictures of what they're showing, you're obviously not a guy. Or you actually think that this is all about products.

Milk milk lemonade, around the corner, fudge is made ;)

White is totally the new black

2007-12-05T01:09:00.000+13:00

Well... it's a bad photo really~~ but hey, just a nice easy show and tell.

The Sony Ericsson W810i - White model

7300 ntd == 300nzd

One day of fun!

2007-12-04T03:19:00.000+13:00

Had a fun fun day in tw today, worthy of a blog post!
You must be thinking, hummm... worthy of a blog post? You post random shit all the time, so how is this even remotely valuable by comparison, you go on about strange things like poems, feelings and thoughts and... - lemme stop you there, i get the point, but just hear my day out.
Woke up in the morning at 11 (ha!) not much of a morning person. Slept in actually, to sound of tires bringing up water from the wet, moist (yes i totally did) concrete. It had been raining (duh). Got up and had brunch - flied lice!
Later on at around 2 (skipped the bit where i played viva pinata for a while) Me n me mum n dad (for those of you who can actually hear me say that congrats, i have you brainwashed - if you can't, you have luckily escaped my.... not so wrathful wrath).
N - E - WAY! Rode the train (only 20 twd - 25twd-1nzd) 3 stops, and then took a bus (12) to see the grand COMPUTER EXHIBITION! Well... lots of hotties on stages calling out what you have to scream to get prises, managed to get 1 hammer and some other little trinkets, too bad i couldn't get the AMD blow up glaive, totally bummed about that, and a mini octopus on a stick - also large and blown up. DAMN! But got some sexy smashing pictures.
Took the free bus back to the train station and took another ride to taipei central strain station, MASSIVE BUILDING with umm.... 4 underground streets (approx 1km maybe? filled with shops). Went above ground to see crowds of people, streets filled with food outlets and a major department store.
Went to see how much my new phone's gonna be, a wopping 7.3k (NOT NZD FOOLS) Sony Ericsson's W810i (sings justin's sexy back - just reminded me of sexy but it doesn't have a sexy back), what colour to choose from? Me is gonna go for the pure innocent white shell cus everyone else gets black and black is totally over rated in my opinion.
Another side quest to get some plastic stools and some cooking stuff and took the train back home, 25 bux.

Main quest - Architect association (completed)
500xp and 500 gold (real dollars)
Main quest - Go to computer exhibition (completed)
1,000 xp
Side quest - obtain as many possible trinkets as possible (obtained a few) (completed)
1 hammer, 3 sticks of air(don't ask), screen duster
Main quest - Buy Cell phone (Failed, return later to finish quest)
Side quest - Buy some plastic seats and cooking goods (completed)
200xp, 5 plastic seats, sets of chopsticks and plastic scraping thing for baking stuff!
Level up!

Education - The Masters

2007-12-02T06:16:00.000+13:00

Something about our society keeps on popping up in my dad's conversations that he has with his friends (cause he drags me along anyway) - Education!
Well... you may be thinking, "pffft, education, there's heaps of stuff wrong with it" And you are RIGHT! I mean... not to buy into my dad's propaganda (cause subliminally i listen to him and give his opinions an extra bonus rating, a boost in "general sense") Speaking from a person who's been "propaganda-ed" here's what I have to say. (more like what he has to say)

It's about the level of educated people out there, this may not apply anywhere else in the world, but it does apply here in TW. People here, A LOT OF PEOPLE have masters and PHDs here, AMAZING AMOUNT OF PEOPLE, but here's a funny true story:
One of his friend recently hired a post-grad master's to do some copying of some building blueprints. And seeing as how some blue prints have folds in them, he copied the folds!!!! I mean... actually thought they were part of the building, a line down the middle of a perfectly well designed building. True true story.
So what I'm saying is that, education like this is overated here in TW, i'm so glad my folks took me out of TW so early so my university education will not be questioned in any other country.

More on education later

On the floor

2007-11-25T00:30:00.000+13:00

We here in taiwan use a very newly made system of living. It's called the floor storage system

The bed is on the floor
Microwave is also on the floor
Oven is also on the floor
Rice cooker is ON THE FLOOR
Even the TV is on the floor

The city

2007-11-23T19:28:00.000+13:00

Just walking around outside and shopping for some at home while nobody's looking pants (possible gym pants) and wandered around a market place, kinda like really tiny streets with stalls on both sides and lots of stuff on sale.
It's raining today and as i walked around, i see a lot of potential for photog shots, very very good contrast of colours and themes in general.
Such as new building vs old buildings.
Actually, that's the only example i can really give, seeing as how it's a city built strangely.
Will take camera out with me next time.

New Diggs for 90 days

2007-11-22T12:34:00.000+13:00

Sup yos, just letting yous know that i'm not lost on an island somewhere. Saw one of my favourite phrases at chch airport, hilarious. Also saw Yinny :\ too bad her flight got pwned, something to do with a light aircraft accident or something. BOOM! Hopefully she made it safely to wells, Did NOT see reubo at the airport, by the time i did get there to aucks, gates for KL were closed :D
Fun fun fun! Spending time inside for 90 days :\
Will try to look for
-Hobo Gloves
-Large Fuzzy Dice
-anything ridiculously AWESOME

*ooo i see "emily the strange" bag*

Expressionless

2007-11-15T23:49:00.000+13:00

Ever had one of those days/moments when you want to express yourself, but every single thing you attempt fails horribly? Or more realistically you don't perform this "attempt" (rephrased - you don't attempt) this emotion/feeling/thought?
Sometimes it's like almost sneezing but unable to, it's almost as frustrating as trying to achieve a "climax" and it's almost there and NO~! BAM!!! (or to the point, no bam) The frustration is beyond you and you just want to give up trying to do it. (please refrain from personal comments regarding this metaphor)

My advice, try anyway, use words or any means you can - which DOES NOT INCLUDE PHYSICAL HARM! (you know who you are).

Highs and Lows

2007-11-15T00:05:00.000+13:00

How would you feel if you won the lottery of 10 million dollars and then your mum dies of a heart attack right on the scene?
What are you suppose to feel? Well... should feel bad cause of your mum, but are you even allowed to feel good about the money?
Out of respect, you wouldn't go around her wake and flash your cash - so to speak.
Terrible thought, but you'd be expected to do something strange.

Lazy

2007-11-14T12:20:00.000+13:00

We are lazy? Nooo~~ But we do all that work and earn money - SO WE CAN BE LAZY! Ultimately, a person is boiled down to how much they can appreciate being lazy. Money is just the currency of which that can buy more laziness, which is what we really want. But! If you spend your entire life earning money and not spending any time being lazy, you're just denying yourself of your true objective in life.
But! You have to think ahead a few steps for the remainder of your life to BE lazy. Such as an education and a job. Thing we do to be more lazy, later on.

Still not convinced?
Why did man invent the wheel? To transport goods faster so more time to laze around.
Why did man invent the car? Same thing as above.
Why did man invent a calculator? Saves time so you can be more lazy!
You can argue productivity which leads to more money and more money TO BE LAZY~~
*YAWN!*
Sleep time?

Being true to yourself

2007-11-10T21:42:00.000+13:00

When is a good time to be true to yourself and the way you feel on the inside?
When is a good time to save yourself from yourself?
Time to time, we all feel the urge to slap our bosses, our friends, or even tell someone what they don't want to hear. But, we are reminded of the possible fallout options, hummmmm so you take the easy route, to not act on what you believe in. Such actions are looked as unfavourable, cowardly, or even self destructive (as a therapist would suggest). Holding your own feelings so you can "live another day" can do unseen damage, like bread crumbs dropped on the floor left for an infestation of ants. Or, the commonly used bottled fury example.

Is it simply better just to express your feelings openly rather than holding onto it tightly? Some might believe that if it would hurt you in the long run, you will have to grip on tightly, if it's not too hurtful, (to yourself or another) you should act upon it. It's a common rule of generosity that lives within us that keeps us from telling hurtful things to ourselves and otherwise.

Sometimes these moments aren't so clear, to tell them? Or to sit on it? I wish there weren't such a personality built into people.

Procrastination

2007-11-08T15:00:00.000+13:00

We all do it, it's something to pass the unwanted time

Difficulty curve of education

2007-11-07T21:21:00.000+13:00

Well! In case you haven't noticed (i'm pretty sure you HAVE!) You've been saying to your younger colleagues (or them turds), "Last year!!? pffft! last year was piss easy. THIS year is hard!"
And you say to your peers, "This is totally hard" and then your older, hopefully more educated friends say, "HA! That stuff is a cake walk! What I'm doing now is hard!"

Which in a way is kinda funny cause whatever you do, you'll find it hard, and whatever you HAVE already done you find it easy. And this is called the Education Difficulty curve! (or whatever it's legitimate name is)
As you all are aware, this curve is called a curve! It is not a simple linear function (straight line for you nubs) It's more like a slightly skewed exponential curve.
Now! Extend that level of difficulty and project next year's value of difficulty! FUN!

Women and Crazy Eyes!!

2007-11-04T21:42:00.000+13:00

Recently I watched "how i met your mother" a tv sitcom, HILARIOUS! They raised an issue that seemed very real.
CRAZY EYES!!!
Men can see into a woman's eyes and see whether or not they have "crazy eyes" or not. When you find someone that has crazy eyes, they might be good at sex or what not, but ultimately THEY WILL GO CRAZY!!!

Literally!!

2007-11-01T16:43:00.001+13:00

Ever meet someone who literally uses the word literally incorrectly all the time? Here is an example of the word used incorrectly:
...and his brain literally exploded... and then he said (X) WRONG!!!
Here's one that's just disgusting:
My mouth literally ejaculated!

He's driving me insane! So what did I do? I literally put a bullet through his head by screaming at him - WRONG!!!
Literally is used when you ACTUALLY DID IT
Here's one that i think is wrong but sounds okay.
The room literally looked like a tornado came in and said hi!
Still... a little odd, suppose it can be used as a metaphor or something.

GAH!!! Why am i teaching freeking english!

Something "shiny"!

2007-10-31T19:33:00.000+13:00

Ever find something "shiny" to the point you just have to bask in it's o-so-wonderful-shininess? *can't believe shininess is a word*
Well! You stare at it's shininess for like... EVER! And it's just so magnificent. SHINE!!!! Ness! I mean, honestly! It's like teh awesomes!!! But!!! You realise at some point that it's just shiny. Nothing else but all flash. And you're wasting time on it, so much time you could be wasting it on other stuff.

Escape

2007-10-31T00:33:00.000+13:00

The smell of wet grass reminded her of home. It's been so long since she ran through the meadow. The warm summer breeze offers her hair a dance - so brisk, and short lived. She turned towards the wind, feeling every stroke of nature's gentle brush. She closed her eyes. With the aid of the wind, her soul escaped her body, running loose across a field of lavender. The smell flowed through her like a stream of melted snow invigorating. Someone was calling her name. Like poison, this voice crippled the lavender, tainted the smell and choked the wind.

Everything escaped her, the lavender faded away and replaced with the smell of printing chemicals. The warm summer breeze turns to stale cold conditioned air ripping her hair on the dance floor. She clenched her eyes as she did not want her eyes to feel the needles that the wind carried. A man walks past followed by an infectious smell. Hot coffee spilled and the nylon carpet screamed. The phone rang, the people yelled, the printer beeped, the man farts, and hair fell.

She watched the bird on the window sill - how nice it would be to completely oblivious to all this.
----------------------
Story a person working in the office and hating the job. Portrays a stressful environment and how nice it would be to find serenity and escape this living hell.

To the left

2007-10-29T17:46:00.000+13:00

To the left, everything you don't want to deal with, you'll put it in a box and chuck it to the left.
If only it were that simple.

Falling

2007-10-28T17:58:00.000+13:00

Cold. It's all he can feel. His hands, like a metal claw, grabs onto the ice pick. His feet, slowly making their way towards the top. He tries to breathe in air, but finds frosted needles. His lungs like the four seasons, summer soon followed by winter. His body detested him and vise versa. He curses silently - is this the end for him? Another stab into the sheet of ice with his foot, it's loose! He hangs for a moment. He looks down, the loose ice sheet free from it's siblings - falling into the dark clouds below. He has to live on! He readjusts himself into a safer position. He takes a breather. His eyes, heavy from lack of sleep, his muscles wept from the intensity. He reaches into is jacket - a picture of his family. A warm feeling comes through wave after wave - he feels stronger now. He pulls out the ice pick and stabs it in once more - somethings not right, the ice cracks. He falls.

His muscles flinched, they panicked at the thought of free fall. His bladder, at its limit. His eyes almost unable to stay in his eye sockets. His stomach rises up to his lungs. He screams as he descends. "This is surely the end," he says to himself, "Wife, kids, world, I wish I were kinder to you all." A ray of light pierces the thick dark fog that is the uncomfortable, empty bed. His screams stop, he has accepted his defeat. All he awaits now is death. He expected it to be shorter, but these last moments of his life seemed very long. What's this? A hand reaches through the dark fog. He strains himself to reach it. He is so close, just an inch away. Half an inch, quarter. Contact!

He opens his eyes to see he solid ice sheet sliding in front of him, is he soaring upwards? No. He looks left, a static image, right, the same. He regains some sensation in his metal claw, what's this? A tight grip. He looks up to see a friendly face, his saviour, smiling down at him.

Thanks friend.

Do not follow in the path of the fallen

2007-10-28T17:12:00.000+13:00

How the fallen have taught us.
Learn from their mistakes,
Do things differently.
Mistakes are plentiful,
For yours to make.
A waste of a life,
To make mistakes already made,
Better to make unmade mistakes.
-------------
Just jibberish, but you should get the point.
If not
Point - listen to people who've made the mistake before and learn from their experience. As well as make your own new mistakes. Otherwise the learning process would be a lot harder.

The things we do

2007-10-26T20:05:00.000+13:00

A lot about a person you can tell by the way they act, talk and even walk.
Why are some people difficult to talk to?
Why are some people so unwilling to change?
Why people want relationships but end them so fast before they start?
Why people make promises they can't keep?
Why people argue over nothing?
Why people do the things they do.
The answer is woven into their tapestry. Their whole life contributes to who they are. At least that's what I think. The theory goes, a set of twins, from a whore of a mother and a rapist of a father, were given to two different sets of parents. One, with a very good parenting skills, and the other deficient. The argument is that their genetics will guide them towards something terrible, maybe even a natural urge to spread their legs (if girls) or a deep desire for raping!!
Can parents and people effect us so much that our own genetic desires are suppressed and overcome? Or are who we are literally built into us from conception?

Right now, i have no idea where I'm going with this, but who knows. I might be thinking something else but a little harder to put mind onto the keyboard ;)

To bite and to hold

2007-10-20T17:42:00.000+13:00

Sounds kinda vampiric doesn't it? Well... sorta. Came across a rather.... thought? Maybe fun for me, but could be any of the following to you : Strange, Kinky, disgusting, painful. Maybe some others.

What can i say? it's spring, and my natural biology is telling me to procreate. Think of it this way, a tiger knows how to pounce on a gazelle, it's like a, "pounce on that gazelle" gene. Either that or it's just boring atm, and no tv... yes... we all know what happened when TV was invented. Birth rates plummeted. It replaced the national adult's common pass time.

I'll start with a slight touch of the arm.... a whisper in the ear and a bite or two :D

wika wika booom boom!

2007-10-17T18:27:00.000+13:00

Like on a gangsta rap C--D!! I'z totally loving dat shit from down at the crib yall! You know how I lovem dem shit from back home aight! Bring it to me aight?
What
THE
FUCK!!!
You know what i hate more and more every day. People who can't speak english correctly. Or speak it without correct grammar! It's OKAY!!! if they know they're not speaking correctly and always looking to improve. what's NOT OKAY!!! IS THEM TALKING a LOT!!! and always getting words wrong
The MOST COMMONLY USED WORD IS "la" instead of "the" or "deh" it's like.... "DO YOU WANT A MASSIVE RUBBER DILDO IN YOUR MOUTH!!!?" Man!!! Maybe you need to practise how to do a blow job!!! At least you'll learn how to use your GOD DAMN TONGUE in the blowing process!!!
And Second thing are those fucking gangster wanna be!! DUDE, you're not black!! You're just some fucked up kid who thinks he's cool. Stop being a fucking poser and make your own fuckin style. At least you get points for originality, you seem to be failing everything else in life, at least have some self respect and make your own style.
Third!!! Been reading some of that shitty Canta Magazine we have. PEOPLE NEED TO LEARN HOW TO RANT!!! In later years, I might just post up a tutorial class with a bunch of people to learn how to rant!! It'll be called "Rant 101" Along with "Convo 110 and 112" Where we learn how to start a conversation and keep the flow going!!! It'll be under the Arts degree or even the education degree. KIDS NEED TO KNOW HOW TO GET THEIR RANT THROUGH TO OTHERS!!!
I'm gonna go find someone to shove a dildo in!!!

Btw... I'm not angry, just feeling like i need to rant about something that's very every-day

The door

2007-10-16T21:38:00.001+13:00

Just the other week I was very very excited jumping about and walking around at very fast speeds around the house. And SUDDENLY!!! I opened the door and we had a moment. I was like... "oh, dude... it's okay. It's okay, chill!!" and patted the door like I was comforting it.

HONESTLY! After it, I said to myself, "wtf was that about?" And still! I don't exactly know what it was about. Maybe i was trippin on acid of some sort. Which made me realise all these little moments we take for granted. Sometimes, you should really learn to value time differently. Sometimes you have to learn to appreciate what you have. A roof over your head. Warm blankets, a nice soft pillow, hot showers.

If you notice everything around in your life and learn their true values, you won't kill yourself. You'll be thankful. Either that, or go to a 3rd world country and stay there for a year. You'll probably either die, or be killed. AND if you do somehow survive, you'll learn to appreciate things like never before. LIKE TOILET PAPER!!

Every man has a dream, it's just whether or not it has spanks or not.

2007-10-15T22:55:00.001+13:00

Everyone has their own dreams. At the age of 5, young little naive boyz want to be hot sexy male firemen!! Which some might become, and other will do the same thing - dance around poles and put out "fires" - if you know what i mean - and yes you should - cause i know you do~~

Some little boys have really simple dreams. Score max points at the arcade machine. Sad... but at least it's somewhat achievable. Then comes the korean proz gamers which 10 folds the current top score. And you've got yourself a hater of life :D

I have no idea where I'm going with this, so I'm just gonna stop here :D Just ponder this thought
Hot sexy muscular men dancing around a pole stripping with bright yellow and orange jackets on. AND A SAFETY HELMET!!! - OOO YEA!
Spankalicious! (i'm thinking about hawt sexy woman, instead of men. I know you're not!!)

Assumptions.

2007-10-12T23:33:00.000+13:00

I've been taught never to assume anything. But I do it very very VERY often. I exercise my ability to assume all the time. I assume that the bus will arrive maybe in 4 min? I assume that people know how to walk on their two legs. I assume that if I give you a simple task, you'll do it.
Now...
If you're reading this, you would've already said "hahaha, AS IF!" and now i'm assuming that you're naming names of people who you can't trust to do simple things. Hold on for a few moments. Why not assume that they won't do the work? Woah!!! hold on there panny boy. People don't like a control freak!! But wait. If you do want a job done you gotta do it yourself right? Hummm....
All these sayings... and none of them can be applied. I'll talk about character development in a later post.

Bottom line is, you should never assume people to do their work. Maybe construct that bridge of yours a little over towards their side, just in case they don't live up to your expectations.

On a foot note. The recent poems are just what I've been pondering upon. May not exactly reflect directly, but I'm not weeping or anything. Not about to cut myself open. Putting words elegantly into a poem takes time and thought. Should give it a try sometime yourself.

Secrets

2007-10-09T16:49:00.000+13:00

We all keep secrets,
Some written in ink,
Some written in bold,
Some written in blood,
or set in a mold.

We all keep secrets,
Some smaller than a mouse,
Some bigger than a house,
Some longer than a hose,
or short lived like a rose.

We all keep secrets,
Some about each other,
Some about our lover,
Some about ourselves,
no, most about ourselves.

Take me away

2007-10-08T19:50:00.000+13:00

Every time you stand near me
You take my breath away,
Leaving me breathless.

Every time you talk to me
You take my words away,
Leaving me speechless.

Every time you look at me
You take away my sight away,
Leaving me blind.

Every time you touch me
You take my soul away,
Leaving me eternally bound to you.

10 things I miss about you

2007-10-06T21:38:00.000+13:00

For your information, it's not directed at anyone, it's just the generic feeling!!! OKAY!!!? Any comments regarding certain someone will be axed!!! or... X-ed

There are things I can do, tell, feel, all of them I miss
I miss the way your hair smells...
I miss the way your skin feels against my lips...
I miss the way you hold me...
I miss the way you make that sound when you think...
I miss the way you walk...
I miss the way you whisper into my ear...
I miss the way you fight for your beliefs...
I miss the way you look at me...
I miss the way you surprise me every time...
I miss the way you....
Heh, I just miss you.

Internal bleeding

2007-10-05T20:46:00.000+13:00

When your heart, soul and mind disagree with one another, you will begin to bleed. Whether it be fast, or very very slow. Your heart will pump poison. Your brain will play the master. Your soul begins to burn. The damage continues... it could be a silent war, it can last for eternity. But that bleeding will continue without you knowing.

Internal struggles, we all have them, whether we chose to agree, find common ground, or fight. The amount of bloodshed varies.

Peace is hard to come by, find the insurgency and crush it before you bleed to death.

Honestly!!? Honesty!!?

2007-10-03T16:42:00.000+13:00

Picture a bunch of girls discussing about how they would just enjoy a little honesty at the bar sometimes... like guys should just come up to them and lay things down and show them their true intentions!!

Later on in the night, the same group of girls sit around and order drinks and then head off towards the dance floor. A few guys sitting down at a booth of the bar look around and it's time they went hunting. A guy sees what he likes, one of the remaining one at the bar, she looks so great to him. So, he goes up to her and says, "I'm interested, would you like to suck on my penis as I lick you out and then we have lots and lots of wild sex for a few hours before I head off for an early meeting in the morning?"

Obviously the guy gets slapped in the face. Now... question is... what.. the hell!!?

Hardo gay!!! Love this guy!!

2007-10-02T17:46:00.000+13:00

More milk please

2007-10-02T17:32:00.000+13:00

My Driveway

2007-10-01T15:58:00.001+13:00

The sky is now clear, spring is already here and I'm breaking out my camera for a few shots. As I walked towards Allan's place, i saw this lovely carpet of petals mixed with grass. Looked at the tree and then said... Hummm... that would be pretty. Ran back home (green roofed one at the end with the car out front) grabbed my camera and took this shot. One's Photoshopped and the other isn't.

Obviously it's a little green slash dark.

Mmmmm Sky looks nice

The topic of my discussion.... Books you say?

2007-09-30T00:39:00.001+12:00

Well... it has come to my attention that I!! Yes.. I!!! Seldom flip open a fiction book. Now.... is this an issue? According to my primary teachers........ "Books are our friends" and according to Shorty from Scary Movie 2, "I've learned the value of books!!! Free paper!!" followed by a hideous laughter.

Well... Books have never been my daily entertainment. It's more of a chore I have to do. Especially for highschool. BOOK REPORTS!!! Man.. oh man! Made me feel like a kid to write up 200 words of how I felt after reading the book... "I felt okay... could go for some BK... ummm... i mean.... because... Fred was a... umm.... orphan... with... no money!! Yea.. so no food and it made me feel lucky that we have food presented to us in such a manner. This did not impact me too much at the beginning to think about Fred as a poor orphan. But later on in the book when he was living on the streets and dealing with hardship... he died due to starvation. That also made me sad."

YEA!! I don't even remember reading a book about a boring character name Fred! HONESTLY! In our little group, we very very very rarely discuss about books. Some of my other friends says that I should read this and that cause in some way they think I'd actually seek it out. Humm... I do agree that books might be healthy for the mind, but I'm perfectly fine!!!! *gulps a cocktail of pills*

Lack of posts?

2007-09-27T21:49:00.000+12:00

Well.. recently, nothing big has been happening. Not enough to make a post about it. but SINCE PEOPLE ARE ASKING QUESTIONS. I'll post one just for the sake of their entertainment!

We all know that exams are a few weeks away (3 weeks + 3 weeks = 6 weeks) *yay* So... I'm sorta sitting around home... watching a few things here and there... and then doing a little bit of reading... here and there. And BAM!!! Nothing big happens.

Maybe it's just this sleepy shit hole town... but I'm not getting any action!!! by action, i mean any activities in general, not that I go out every friday night either :( Maybe THAT'S WHY!! But that's beside the point. Totally need to get my restricted. grrrr!!! That way i can drive to wherever and wherever!! And be with nobody lol. As far as Daddy knows :D

The lack of posts generally come from lack of interesting things to post about. Except that I managed to get Bioshock working today, i feel good now that i can start killing little sisters!!! MUAHAHAAAAA.... Mmmmm... ADAM!!! (it's a substance in the game, not an actual person)